Updated on May 3, 2019
Part of the Greater Danbury area, Bethel has always been the quiet one. On the surface, that is. If you dig deeper, you will see it has a thriving restaurant scene, boutique shops, art studios and independent bookstores. All it needed was its very own brewery. Last Spring, the new kid on the block, Broken Symmetry, took care of that.
It’s located in the old train depot, right by the tracks, which of course, adds to its rustic charms. What else do they have going for them? Long shared tables inside (beer hall style), exposed beams up high, repurposed wood on the walls, a patio outside, handwritten chalkboard menu up above the counter and a fine collection of beer on tap.
If you are not into craft beer, they have Cross Culture Kombucha and an array of other non-alcoholic drinks. And best of all, apart from the usual fries, they have tacos and burritos and wild shrimp to accompany each sip. I enjoy my beer more with food, so it’s right up my alley. Doesn’t hurt that the food is delicious and the greens are locally sourced from Holbrook Farms.
Post a stint at a neighboring Tap Room, my friends and I went there on a Saturday night, and were pleasantly surprised. We cut it close to closing time but that didn’t stop us from trying out quite a few of their beers and bites.
Not to be a beer nerd, but I have been reading up on various brews, and it turns out that kolsches are unique. Originally from Cologne, Germany, this fancy little hybrid is fermented with ale yeast but finished in cold temperatures like a lager. Like India pale lager, it uses a mix of techniques and the result is a cliche-challenging well-balanced beverage.
The kolsch I tasted at Broken Symmetry had the crisp clean finish one would expect from a pale lager, without missing out on the punch altogether. The subdued hint of fruitiness from the mango made it go down well. I was told that the IPA and the mango kolsch are their fastest moving beers.
Perfectly refreshing for a warm spring evening, the kolsch is something I would go back for. Also, I need to find out the story behind the name “Broken Symmetry” and the logo. A tour of the brewery would be nice too.
Craft brew and lovely plates notwithstanding, I doubt I would have enjoyed the place half as much if it wasn’t for the company. In the coming weeks, I can see this fine little Bethel Gastro Brewery climbing the ranks of our most-favored haunts.
Updated on April 1, 2019
The first couple of years with a baby can often translate into less time and even lesser inclination for long-distance travel. Some people will forge on, undeterred by sleepless nights but that’s not who I am. I like taking it easy.
While writing about Ursula K. Le Guin’s writing routines and her take on interruptions, my current favorite blogger/writer/artist/parent Austin Kleon has a lovely thing to say –
Keeping that in mind, I am taking it slow. We are reading books, making messes, eating leisurely lunches, making messes while eating those aforementioned lunches, learning how to clap, and walk, and talk.
But recently we made time to visit the EverWonder Children’s Museum in Newtown, Connecticut. I have written about it earlier here. Unpretentious to a fault, it’s a nice little fun place for kids.
They were hosting Microsoft’s Coding with Minecraft event and the thing that threw me off the most about it was the ratio of girls to boys. It was 1:14. What do we need to do to get more girls into coding? Make everything pink? To be clear, I say that with sarcasm. Growing up, I didn’t care much for the color and as it turns out, neither did the two women who were at the event on behalf of Microsoft.
While we are on the subject of Minecraft, I should add that Microsoft is trying to distance itself from the creator of the game, Markus “Notch” Persson. He sold Minecraft to Microsoft for 2.5 billion in 2014, and since then he has developed a controversial online persona. Google his craziness if you must, and you will be flooded with more tweets and stories than you need.
While the seven-year-old tinkered with making chickens rain and building brick roads, I took the one year old to the toddler play area. I must say it was nice to see him make a beeline for the books.
Speaking of board books, There’s a Monster in your Book is a big hit with the little one. All through we shake and spin and flip the book to get the monster out, but at the end, there’s a twist. Yes, a twist in a baby book if you can believe that. I am smiling as I type this.
As for the second grader, he is into Peter Brown’s The Wild Robot. The underlying themes are super deep and it says a lot about inclusion and acceptance, amongst other things. Although it’s on my list of “books I want to read”, I am rather busy with the monster, unruly and impossible as he is.
Updated on February 27, 2019
New England weather doesn’t always lend itself to outdoor activities. We had the Polar Vortex, the school-is-delayed-due-to-icing mornings, the rattle-your-windows kind of a windy day, and more. So however idyllic it may sound, “go outside and play” doesn’t always work here. This means we are stuck with an endless loop of wanted screen time amid chants of “I am bored.”
Is that really a bad thing? What if being bored is actually good for you? It doesn’t even have to be good. Maybe it’s just okay to be bored. For the past many years, my travel related work has had me writing articles as varied as Delicious Hangover Cures From Around the World to Wolf Sanctuaries in Pennsylvania but never have I felt inclined to pen down a 10 point list on how to keep kids entertained on a road trip. Or say, how to navigate a cross-Atlantic flight fraught with delays and layovers, minus the meltdowns.
In an interview with GQ magazine, Lin-Manuel Miranda said “…there is nothing better to spur creativity than a blank page or an empty bedroom.”
Jerry Seinfeld once joked, “When you’re five and you get bored, you cannot support your body weight. I remember going to the bank with my parents … and I would lie down flat, like, ‘Sorry, Mom, there’s nothing I can do. This place is so dull, I cannot get up.’ This is what I think adulthood is: Adulthood is the ability to be totally bored and remain standing.”
So why not let kids get bored once in a while? It would at the least prepare them for adulthood.
In the midst of designing our child’s every waking hour with structured play, maybe we are missing something essential. Boredom often makes the mind wander into uncharted territories and foster a world of imagination that would be hard to come by during an organized activity. Another thing that gets lost in this labyrinth of constant monitoring is self-sufficiency.
Last weekend, when my son, who is all of seven and often “bored”, said he was bored for the umpteenth time, we did what we hardly ever do on a rainy winter afternoon. We went out to explore our new neighborhood. On foot.
Pretend obstacles and random races aside, the constant drizzle brushing against our faces compelled us to be in the moment. The weekend’s to-do list and other trivialities were left forgotten by the wayside.
Here, Elizabeth McCracken’s Bowlaway gives the humble walk a whole new meaning –
“In the mornings he would walk…. At the start of a walk, alone or moving, the sun at his back or cold rain down his collar, he was more himself than under any other circumstance, until he had walked so far he was not himself, not a self, but joined to the world. Invisibly joined. Had a religion been founded on this, purely this, he would have converted. Proof of God?….. Proof was in the world, and the way you visited the world was on foot…. Your walking was a devotion.”
This passage is something I visit often. If nothing, to make me want to stop whatever it is I am doing, pick up the baby, wrap him in his coziest carrier, pull on my warmest boots, and head out the door.
It’s even better when my husband and seven-year-old join us.
Updated on December 30, 2018
I read somewhere that “while children deepen your emotional life, they shrink your outer world to the size of a teacup, at least for a while.” I couldn’t help but nod in agreement, while adding, “more like the size of a shot glass.”
In keeping the above in mind, this has not been a year of travel and adventure. We have a moderately busy seven year old and a ten-month-old who refuses to eat outside his comfort zone, vis-a-vis, his room. Some would say that itself is an adventure.
While low on travels, I have been high on reading, and that’s how I found this website. Austin Kleon is “a writer who draws” and his pages are filled with links to art and music, amidst philosophical musings and random jokes. I can spend hours browsing through his posts. Take this one for example.
I do most of the above, except for play the piano (it’s not that hard if James Rhodes is to be believed), write in my diary, and look at the moon. The last one seems a bit loopy to indulge in while totally sober.
I know what you are thinking, it’s not that simple as making a “dumb” list. Feeling happy is a state of mind as well as state of being. It can be moment-to-moment, that is, having fun, or it can be something more deep and fulfilling. The latter is accentuated by all that jazz about leading a productive and purposeful life.
We tackled a move and welcomed a baby all in the same year, so looking back, I have a lot to be grateful for, but as anybody who has done both will vouch for, it has been super stressful. We may look back someday and laugh at how during the morning rush we used chopsticks to toast some bread or the time we flooded the kitchen floor with an overwhelming amount of soap suds. Filling the dishwasher with the wrong kind of detergent while sleep-deprived will do that to you. But that day is not today.
Going back to the number one point on Kleon’s list, I am reading Right Ho, Jeeves by P.G. Wodehouse and enjoying at as much as I did the first time. My seven year old son made the art you see below and while I didn’t help him draw it, I was there to share a few tips I learnt from my Mom. Speaking of art, Neil Gaiman’s Art Matters seems like a promising winter-time read.
Long walks and naps both fall in the pleasant and refreshing category and I doubt there’s any grown human who will say “Umm, but…”
Scrolling through Instagram may seem like it should have been on the list because it does provide a momentary elusion of happiness, but ultimately it’s a time-sucker and time-waster and a few other things I don’t want to get into right now. It’s not an easy habit to kick, because it was designed to be such. At the end of every year, they have this collage of the top 9 grams on your Insta feed, and in spite of all my complaints, here’s mine for 2018.
Although I am not one to make (or keep) New Year’s resolutions, I am going to try and spend less time on social media. And on that note, I wish you all a happy and crispy fresh 2019!
Updated on December 4, 2018
How long do we have to do something until it becomes a tradition? I would say it’s more about the feeling than the duration. And like everything else in life, traditions should adapt to the changing times. I see that a lot in India these days. New way of doing old things, making them a touch more relatable, and a lot more fair.
All over the world, now’s the time for traditions. As the nights get colder, and the days shorter, people gather around to celebrate. Diwali, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, and of course, Christmas. Did you know that Icelanders have this tradition built around gifting and reading books on Christmas Eve? Throw in a cozy fireplace and a hot cup of cocoa, and there you have it – my kind of celebration.
Taking a page out of their hygge-filled Scandinavian book, we have made our very own, rather new, but quite simple holiday tradition. We hop over to Ridgefield during their holiday stroll.
Ridgefield is one of those New England towns that is the right amount of charming during the holiday season, complete with pretty red bows tied neatly around colonial lamp posts. Take a peek at last year’s stroll and you will know what I am talking about.
We walk down the street, listening to carols and admiring the ice sculptures. Then we pop into Books on the Common and spend a good amount of time browsing in the warmth. During checkout, I love how they slip in their branded black-and-white bookmark, which has this quote from Erasmus – “When I have a little money, I buy books; and if I have any left, I buy food and clothes.”
Before heading back, we stop at Prime Burger for their specials. Our elementary-school-goer rarely looks up from his newly-acquired book, while we enjoy the Prime Sauce and onion rings. This year was special, as our nine-month-old baby joined us for a bite. Between streams of excited babbling, he let us know that he didn’t mind being a part of this whole stroll-sing-read-eat-drink venture. In fact, he quite enjoyed it.
This has been a year of packing and moving, and at the same time, getting to know a brand new member of the family, one whose dimples make those sleepless nights seem alright. Anybody who has ever moved will tell you how much of a hassle moving is, especially with a baby, but we have been lucky enough to stay in the same locality, enjoying the familiar, sometimes with the air of a curious out-of-towner.
During a year as busy as this one, it’s the small moments that count. The slow ones. The ones that don’t require a lot of planning or traveling. Moments that create new traditions.
How can traditions be “new” you say? I believe that traditions can be whatever we want them to be.
So, what “new traditions” are you making this holiday season?
Updated on December 3, 2018
Data is here to stay. Unlike Summer, which is gone. At least for this year, in my part of the world.
We are done with barbecues and pools. We are now talking back-to-school supplies and pumpkin flavored everything. Like it or not, lacing everything with the flavor of fall is a marketing ploy that’s not going anywhere soon.
For me this was the summer of Web Analytics, and in turn, trying to understand the role of data in advertising. It is pretty much what everyone talks about these days, even during a celebration of artistic work, like during this year’s Cannes Lions International Festival of Creativity. Turns out AI held court during many a presentation.
AI observes and learns from past behaviors and is essentially derivative. It is helpful in tracking advertising efforts. It crunches past numbers and informs us. Lets us know what is working and what is not. Creativity on the other hand is fueled by the power of storytelling. It needs emotional connection and humor. I think what data can do is propel it in the right direction.
But can it take over the creative side of advertising and start producing engaging marketing content? Well, although AI could become essential to the process as a whole (if it hasn’t already), it falls short when it comes to taking risks or taking the proverbial road less traveled. We need people for those and the crazier the idea, the better it is.
Speaking of crazy good ideas, O&M’s pug campaign for Hutch Cellular Service in India, comes to mind. Way back in 2003, they showed a boy with a dog that followed him everywhere. The tagline was “wherever you go, our network will follow.” No phones were shown. Hell, nobody even spoke a word. Not even a woof. Just a feel-good background score. According to Businessworld, “Hutch saw its subscriber base shooting up by over 70 per cent right after the campaign broke.” And I am not even getting into the awards and accolades. They were too many to count.
Setting aside creative pursuits, let’s consider Web Analytics, as it has become a vital part of advertising. Even here, we need the human touch to interpret the data and write out the actionable insights in plain english. As Avinash Kaushik says,
“Your dashboard should have some data, but what it really needs are three sections: Insights, Actions, Business Impact. IABI.
We have a wide selection of tools that helps us mine, analyze and visualize huge amounts of data but that doesn’t mean we “puke” data all over. By the way, “customized data puke” or CDP is a term often used on Avinash Kaushik’s blog Occam’s Razor. If you want to learn about web analytics and would rather have a laugh now and then, instead of mindlessly going through jargon-heavy content, his posts are the way to go.
As with other areas of our lives, advertising and marketing is changing rapidly. It’s not just that it is becoming more and more data-driven, the way we consume media is also changing. The rules of gathering data is changing. New bills are being proposed and laws are being laid down as I type.
Meanwhile, plain old imagination, something we try to imbibe in kids since preschool is thriving. Same with basic language skills. What does the data really tell us? We need to write it out in simple english. No frills required. And for both jobs, we need real people. Like you and me.
Sometime in the not too distant future, when the machines have risen, a couple of robots could be reading this and chuckling to themselves, “What a dum-dum! She had no idea, did she?”
Updated on August 20, 2018
Now, you don’t expect people to drive down to Danbury in Connecticut to experience nature, do you? Nah, they would rather go to Maine. Approximately 39 miles northeast of New York City, Danbury is part of the New York metropolitan area and as diverse as one can imagine.
It’s famous for its mall, second largest in Connecticut. It has a thriving restaurant scene but it is constantly upstaged by its neighboring towns when it comes to schools and other amenities coveted by suburban life. But what about that all important proximity to parks and birds and a little bit of wildlife?
Danbury houses all of that in Tarrywile Park, and more. Dotted with birdhouses, and lakes and ponds and hiking trails, it’s one of those secrets that a town with a reputation for being gritty refuses to share with the world. Heck, it even has a mansion.
We go there often. Last week, we arrived at an odd hour, off-peak if you will, and had the entire park mostly to ourselves. I wasn’t sure I liked that. What if a bear jumped out of the dense woods? If you think I am joking, check this out. But then, slowly, people began to flow in, dogs and kids filled the peace and quiet. Yes, the very same peace and quiet I wasn’t so sure I was enjoying before.
One dog-walker forgot to pick up after one of her four-legged friends, so I had to go over and tell her. She said she didn’t notice and cleaned up the mess. Of course, this is something I would rather not do on a walk. I would rather be alone with my thoughts. Or spend that time pointing out bugs and birds and crazy leaf patterns to my kids. Wouldn’t you?
But that’s the problem with life. Either it’s too quiet. Or it’s too loud and busy. Maybe there’s an in-between. Maybe there isn’t, and you have to find your own in-between.
Updated on July 10, 2018
What is a pronoun?
It is a noun that has lost its amateur status.
These two lines cracked my 6 year old up. He was reading Calvin and Hobbes. When he narrated the joke to me, I was elbow deep in some mundane work and probably didn’t even crack a real smile. Uh-huh, I must have said. But later that night, as I was getting ready for bed, this silly joke crossed my tired mind and I burst out laughing.
It happens all the time, doesn’t it? A familiar tune. A warm phone call. A funny text. A weird moment. Something that makes us laugh. But then we forget about it. ‘Cause we have forms to fill and errands to run. I wish someone had told me that ninety percent of adult life is filling out forms. And that one day I would be thankful for naps, not view them as some sort of prolonged and unnatural punishment.
Speaking of errands and chores, I often listen to podcasts while doing them, and one fine day I chanced upon The Science of Happiness By PRI and the Greater Good Science Center. I clicked on Three Funny Things readying myself for three funny jokes, or something like that. But instead, I found an exercise for happiness. The podcast suggested we list three funny things from the day gone by, possibly before going to bed. It could be anything as long as it makes you laugh.
I, of course, had to make it simpler. I began by listing two funny things. And I may have counted a wave of nostalgia as a “laugh.” That’s how a Spice Girl number made it to the list. Yes, I know what you are thinking but we are not here to talk about my taste in music.
What I am trying to say here is this – try thinking of two or three funny things that happened during the day. Laughter is important. Happiness is elusive. Even the very rich and very successful and superbly talented falter to find it at times. So, if during the course of a day we happen to find it, we should relive the moment. Make it linger.
After all, when it comes to anecdotes about our families, don’t we remember the ones that are oft-repeated? The ones that are mentioned at every holiday and told to every newcomer at the dinner table?
The makers of the podcast have a detailed step-by-step exercise for practicing Three Funny things. But I went rogue and did it my way. The sillier the better, I thought.
I went through old photos one night. Some of them, like the one above, made me smile. As did the one below.
It could be a joke in a group text. Or something you overheard a kid say. Kids say the darndest things as we all know. They provide easy fodder, don’t they? It could be a sarcastic meme you shared with your brother. A ridiculous incident that had everyone cracking up at work. A story recounted by your parents where they seem to agree on almost nothing, so much so, that it sounded like two completely different events.
It could be anything. And everything. Doesn’t even have to make you laugh. Or smile. It just needs to make you feel good. There, I made the exercise simpler. Now go try it.
Updated on May 31, 2018
I began the day by reading this delightful article On Eating Alone in Paris. There’s something so self-affirming about being alone and not feeling lonely. It’s like telling yourself, “Hey girl, I like spending time with you!”
As I was reading the piece on dining solo, I was reminded of a lovely little write-up by my aunt about a rare flower on her window sill, and how she took time out from her busy morning to quietly celebrate the occasion. These moments, these seemingly unimportant moments, are what life is all about.
An NY Mag article about Yale University Professor, Laurie Santos, and her wildly popular college course on happiness, tells us that “Dr. Santos came up with a straightforward way of communicating the concept of time affluence to her students. After the midterm, when they arrived on the day of the “special event,” Santos and her teaching assistants handed out flyers at the door of the lecture hall that read “Class is canceled. Go practice time affluence. You have one free hour.” The only proviso was that they were not allowed to fill that hour with work. They had to do something unexpected: Read for pleasure. Take a hike. Meet a friend for coffee. One student was so grateful for this one-hour reprieve in her overpacked schedule that, at news of this gift, she started to cry.”
In most parts of the modern world, being busy is looked up at while an abundance of leisure is looked down on. Hell, it is even frowned upon. Being busy is good. Free time, eh, not so much.
Have you looked around your neighborhood these days? How many kids do you see running around aimlessly? They are probably all sitting somewhere learning Mandarin or practicing the violin. If they are doing physical activities like sports or martial arts, it’s something superbly organized, and often, indoors. Structured play and extra-curriculars fill up their days.
I would rather they just lay in the grass and looked at the puffy white summer clouds floating overhead. Or read a book that is not on their school reading list. Or make a new friend just because they were both outside at the same time, not because their moms have exchanged numbers and arranged play dates.
I am no expert at parenting but I do try to keep my kid’s after school hours as flexible and as unstructured as possible.
As is the case with most six-year-olds, my son is a fine example of taking things slow. Have you watched them get ready for school? It’s a painfully slow process that involves multiple distractions and deviations from the actual job at hand. But that’s another topic for another day.
This summer I plan to take it slow.
Watch my kids grow.
Make them laugh. It gets harder as they enter their teens. My lame “mom” jokes and Captain Underpants brand of humor won’t cut it after a few years.
I plan to cook slowly. Have you tried this slow-roasted indian-spiced salmon from Samin Nosrat’s highly-acclaimed book Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat? Even my fish-averse son loved it. The lovely art is by Wendy MacNaughton and it makes me want to sit with a sketch book and rekindle my love of doodling.
I plan to practice mindfulness. My friend Debarati has an Facebook entire page dedicated to it. If you find yourself in and around New Hampshire, and happen to stumble upon one of her workshops, consider it your lucky day.
I plan to drink my coffee as I would my wine. Savor every sip. If this means waking up an hour earlier so be it.
I plan to walk more. Drive less.
I plan to listen more. Read more. Play more.
Doctor’s appointments and other time-bound engagements aside, summer means no school so I plan to hurry less. What about summer camp you say? Aah. We will probably be the last ones in. Those who know me will tell you that’s never going to happen. Taking it slow doesn’t mean you have to be tardy, am I right? Maybe some diligent planning and waking said six-year-old a tad early than usual would work in our favor. We will see how it all unfolds.
I am going to try and make every day count.
What about you?